The NSPCC earlier this week launched a new research report into the experiences of 11-16 year olds on social networking sites and the strategies they use to deal with things that upset them online. Researchers conducted an online self completion survey in December 2012 of 1,024 11-16 year olds in the UK.
Here’s some of the key findings:
Over one in four (28%) of children aged 11-16 with a profile on a social networking site have experienced something upsetting on it in the last year.
Of the children and young people who were upset, 11% were dealing with upsetting experiences on a daily basis.
The most reported issue experienced on social networking sites was trolling, experienced by 37% of children who had been upset.
Other issues experienced by children who had been upset included: pressure to look or act a certain way (14%), cyber stalking (12%), aggressive and violent language (18%), encouragement to hurt themselves (3%), receiving unwanted sexual messages (12%), and requests to send or respond to a sexual message (8%).
Over half of 11-16 year olds (58%) believed at least one of the people responsible for the behaviour which had upset or bothered them was either a complete stranger, someone they only knew online, or they did not know who it was at all.
Only 22% of the children who were upset talked with someone else face to face about the experience.
“Average is beautiful,” says designer Nickolay Lamm, who created a “Normal Barbie” using the average proportions of a 19-year-old woman. He’s now trying to sell 5,000 of the dolls through a crowdfunding site.
If Barbie were an average young woman, she’d look very different from the toy so many girls grew up with:
Barbie would look more like this: a doll artist Nickolay Lamm designed and built to show that “average” is beautiful.
The project started last year, when Lamm, a Pittsburgh-based artist, designed images of what he called “Normal Barbie” in an attempt to make the doll reflective of real bodies. After Lamm’s original designs went viral, he worked on building other dolls with average proportions.
He used the measurements of an average 19-year-old woman from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention and then molded them to a 3D model of Barbie.
Lamm has now launched a crowdfunding site to produce 5,000 “Lammily” dolls, which will feature average proportions, a light amount of makeup, and joints that bend.
You can buy the doll with a $20 donation. He’s attempting to raise $95,000 to produce the dolls, but says it’s worth it:
“If there’s even a 10% chance that those dolls affect [body image], let’s make it. I’ll build new clothes and accessories after this crowd funding. My plan is for Lammily to come in different ethnicities and body shapes. But all future body shapes will be of healthy typical women.”
He says “Lammily” is an alternative to dolls with unrealistic beauty standards that dominate the market, like Barbie, or the hypersexualized Bratz Dolls.
This morning I did a Junior School assembly on the issue of dealing with conflict:
Explain that about two hundred years ago, it was common for rich or upper class men (the women were too sensible!) to settle a disagreement by having a special sort of fight. Ask if anyone knows what that was called, and what happened, etc.
If someone thought they had been offended by another person and that person refused to apologize, then the person who had been wronged would take a glove and slap the other person on the cheek with it (if appropriate you could demonstrate on a member of staff who’s agreed in advance!). That was the sign that was a challenge to a duel.
If you refused the challenge of a duel then you would be known as a coward. You would lose your honour and respect in society. Duels were often held at dawn in remote places, because duelling was against the law and they didn’t want any witnesses. People were seriously hurt or killed during the duels. We may think it’s mad to behave like this and risk being a killer or being killed just because of an argument, but that’s just what was expected in the society of that time – you might think it’s a bit like gang culture today!
Use five volunteers to show how a duel worked: the two combatants, each with a supporter or ‘second’, and one referee. Begin with the challenge using the glove, as described above.
The referee offered the participants a choice of weapon: pistols, swords, etc. The one who was challenged got to choose what sort of weapon would be used, and the other one (the challenger, who asked for the duel) had to accept this decision and use the same weapon. The referee’s decision on the outcome was final.
If they were using pistols, then starting back to back each combatant would walk five or ten paces away from each other, then turn … and ‘Aim, ready, fire!’
If there was no clear winner, the referee would be asked for their decision who had won.
Ask the children if they think duelling is the best way to settle an argument. Talk about how disputes can escalate and have big consequences.
Now talk about giving offence, apologizing, turning the other cheek (remember the glove?) and being prepared to back down if you’re wrong and being ready to compromise (which isn’t cowardly and sometimes takes more courage).
Optional: Use Jesus’ teaching on turning the other cheek, or ‘Those who live by the sword shall die by the sword’. Explain that these are hard things to understand but Jesus was saying that a peaceful and non-violent answer to any problem is always the best and that is what we should aim for.
What kind of an animal are you? Are you a teddy bear, an owl, a fox, a turtle or a shark?
What on earth am I talking about? Well, apparently we deal with falling out with other people in different ways, so I’ll explain.
Think for a few moments about what you do when you fall out with your brother, sister or friend. Do you ignore the situation, get angry and want to hit out, or do you try to talk about it?
So are you one of these animals? (Pause between each of the following animals to give the pupils a chance to think. Depending on the school, it may be appropriate to get the children to discuss in twos or threes which animal they think they are.)
A teddy bear always gives in to others.
An owl works with others to find an answer that makes everyone happy.
A fox encourages everyone to give in a little, in other words, to compromise.
A turtle avoids arguments, even when in the right.
A shark wants to win at all costs – and doesn’t care what it takes, or the feelings of the other person.
We might think that it’s important not to fall out with other people, always to be friends, never to argue. But, actually, sometimes what’s more important is how we fall out. Learning how to have arguments with people in the right way is an important part of growing up and of playing our part in our world.
For example, a friend in school steals the pencil of another friend. Do we say nothing, and try to keep the peace? No. But a teddy bear would, teddies always give in. A turtle would ignore the fact that there is a problem in the first place. And a shark would go over and hit the friend. Then bring the pencil back.
Obviously none of these ways is right! We need to be an owl or a fox. An owl would get everyone talking to each other to find a solution, and a fox would get everyone to give in a little, get the pencil back and maybe get the friend to lend the pencil for a little while.
Everyone sometimes feels a little angry, or wants to fall out with someone else. Even adults find it difficult to be happy with everyone all the time. The important thing is to find ways of dealing with falling out that help to sort out the problem.
We can’t always ignore how we feel, nor should we ignore bad behaviour, such as a friend stealing a pencil. But if we learn how to talk to other people about how we’re feeling rather than ignoring them, sulking or, even worse, hitting or saying horrible things, we will have learned something very useful for the whole of our lives.
So let’s be owls or foxes – talking about what makes us upset or angry, giving in a little, making sure other people are happy as well as ourselves.
Time for reflection
We’ve had fun with duels. Sports and games can often be a type of duel. As long as we remember to play fair and respect our opponents, these can be great ways to have a contest and remain friends.
But do arguments and games ever go too far? How can you be a person of peace?
Think about a time when you fell out with a friend or family member. What could you have done differently that would have made the situation better?
Dear God,
Help me to be a person of peace.
To have fun with games and sports and contests,
but always be friendly and respectful of other people.
Here’s my adapted version of session 2 from the Winchester Lent course on Growing Authentic Disciples (John 3:1-17) for 11-18 year olds, and my PowerPoint from the session:
Introduction
Secret meetings
If possible, try to set the meeting up to feel a little like the secret encounter between Nicodemus and Jesus. Make the room as dark as possible, lit only with a candle, or a dim light in the corner. Maybe have a cryptic clue on the door that leads to a secret knock so that the young people can’t enter the room until they’ve cracked the code. You could find some mysterious music to play in the room, and even start the session speaking in whispers or hushed tones to emphasise the idea of it being secret and clandestine. It’s all about setting the scene so that the young people can really enter into the reading.
Creative Worship Ideas
A reflection
Help your group to reflect on three of the key words from this first strategic priority with these activities:
Grow: You will need: some compost, seeds and small pots. Allow the young people to feel the compost and seeds. You may want to put the compost in pots and then sow the seeds. Make sure it’s a really hands-on activity resulting in grubby fingers. Ask – what does it mean to grow as a Christian?
Authentic: You will need printouts of logos from some really well known brands – Coca Cola, McDonald’s, Apple, Levi’s … things that they will easily recognise. Explain that they are authentic logos. Ask – what is so important about authenticity?
Disciples: Print out a copy of the icon ‘Christ taking leave of the disciples’. Explain that one of the meanings of the word disciple is ‘pupil’ or ‘apprentice to a master craftsman’. Ask – what would it mean to be an apprentice to Jesus?
Watch the clip from Karate Kid and reflect on what does it mean to be a disciple.
Bible Reading Video
If your group would prefer a video retelling of the reading, then this clip is a faithful retelling of the words from John’s Gospel:
Sermon
1. Time to welcome him.
We live in a time when the King has come and dwelt among us.
Illustration: Have you ever tried to get hold of someone and found they are distracted? You want to speak to them and they are on the ’phone, texting or using Facebook or Twitter? Perhaps they are watching television or a DVD or Blu-Ray, or maybe they are in the middle of something else and they are simply lost in a different world. They are tuned out, and perhaps not even interested in what you are saying because they think they already know what you’re going to say.
Jesus said, ‘Whoever has ears to hear, let them hear.’ For those who were listening, and who saw what was happening when Jesus began his public ministry, recognised the promised King come to assert his authority and to call people to follow him.
Nicodemus is confused about who Jesus is and what he is doing. So when he visits him at night he calls him Rabbi – teacher, though Jesus had not formally been trained, so this was a generous title. But he also lets slip that ‘we know’, that is, he and his friends in the Jewish ruling council have been keeping tabs on what Jesus is saying and doing.
Nicodemus was expecting the King to come at the end of the age, when human history came to its fulfilment. Though the Jews were waiting for the King to come, he was early and surprised them, so they could not ‘receive’ him – is it that time already? They were tuned out and not ready for him. They were distracted by their plans for the people of God. We live in a time when the King has come – it’s time to welcome him. Remember to thank him and worship him today.
2. Time to know him
We live in a time when everyone is invited to know God for themselves, not just the wise, the spiritual, the intellectuals – all who are ready to welcome him.
Illustration: We live in a time of experts: if you want the carpets cleaned you get an expert cleaner; if we want to cook great food we turn to the latest TV chefs, or the experts of yesteryear, like Delia. Nicodemus was used to people coming to him to answer questions, and offer his expert advice. But now he is at a loss to understand what Jesus is saying.
At that time, Nicodemus was highly regarded as a teacher in Israel (or maybe even the teacher in Israel i.e. the generally accepted top theologian of his day?) He had been born into the right family, and was confident that he would enjoy being with Abraham and all other Jews at the great feast in heaven at the end of the age.
Jesus suggests that to be a member of the household of God requires everyone, of whatever human family or race, to be born again or born from above (either of these is possible, one emphasising that he needs to be born into the new kingdom that Jesus has brought into being, and the other that he needs something only God can perform, i.e. to be supernaturally reborn). And Nicodemus does not understand! The new rules for God’s family are that we need to be born of water and the spirit: we need to let go of the past through the outward act of baptism, and then to be made alive by the inward work of the Holy Spirit.
It’s time for you to know him.
Illustration: Think of the central heating system in your home. Throughout the day the pilot light continues to burn quietly, out of sight and out of mind. Then at the right time, the pilot light lights the rest of the burners, which come alight together, heating the water and being driven around the system to create a warm and welcoming home. Many of us can look back to a time when our lives were simply ticking over, before the Holy Spirit lit the main burners and our lives were changed forever, for us and for those around us.
3. Time to follow him.
If we have welcomed him, and got to know him, we need to follow him and live as his people at home, at school, at work and wherever we are, whatever we are doing. The people of the King need to show they belong to him.
Illustration: The problem with mobile phones is that they run out of power at the wrong moment. Just when you need to make that call, the battery is dead or dying. So every so often you need to plug it in.
Jesus goes on to challenge Nicodemus, first from his specialist subject, the Old Testament Scriptures, and then from nature. So Jesus effectively says, if you knew your Old Testament you would remember that there is more to following Yahweh than being born into the right family. Remember Ezekiel? He spoke of a time to come, when you would be baptized by water (outwardly) and the spirit (inwardly) (Ezekiel 36:25-27). The King has come and the new day of cleansing and renewal has begun.
Then, he says, we know about the wind: we can see what it does but we can’t control it. It’s the same with the new birth – its mysterious, we can’t control, it but can experience it for ourselves.
Once we have come to realise who Jesus is, and allowed him to change our hearts, we commit ourselves to walking with him and becoming like him, that is, to being a disciple. Discipleship is for people of any age, any walk of life. It is something we each need to choose to do. And once we have done so, we need to walk with others in the way of Christ, ready to do anything that the King demands of us.
That means living for him at work, at home, among our friends, in the way we handle our neighbours, in what we do with our money, in how we simply live for the King. As we do this, the world will see Christ in us, and be drawn to him for themselves so that they too can be used in the service of the King of Kings.
But the good news is that God is always there, with all the power and resources we need. The Holy Spirit is one like Jesus who walks with us, alongside us. We are always plugged into the mains with him! He will strengthen us to follow Jesus every day, come what may! He will shape us into authentic disciples.
St Augustine:
‘The Gospel of John is deep enough for an elephant to swim and shallow enough for a child not to drown.’
To understand the Gospel of John we need to focus on the prologue: John 1:1-18. The writer’s aim is also repeated towards the end of Gospel, where we read of the intent to present Jesus as the King and to call forth a response of faith and obedience:
30 Now Jesus did many other signs in the presence of his disciples, which are not written in this book. 31 But these are written so that you may come to believe that Jesus is the Messiah, the Son of God, and that through believing you may have life in his name. John 20:30-31 (NRSV)
So John’s theme is ‘Here is your king’, whom he outlines as the pre-incarnate king (1:1-18), the incarnate king (1.19-19:42) and the Risen King (20:1-21:25). The prologue takes us from before the creation of the world to the arrival of the person of Christ among the people, and gives clues as to what we are looking for as we read the rest of the Gospel.
Bible Study Ideas/Questions
Lectio Divina
Lectio Divina (Spiritual Reading) is a great way of helping young people to engage with a Bible passage in a way that they may not have experienced before. The idea is that, when we hear the same passage through several times, certain words and phrases stand out and catch our attention in a way that we might have missed if we’d read the words through only once. Ask three confident readers from your group if they are happy to read the passage through.
Explain that you are going to hear the same words three times and that there will be a pause between each reading. During the pauses, invite the young people to think about what they have heard and ask themselves if any words or phrases caught their attention. At the end there will be questions to help them reflect further.
You may need to make it clear for your group that there are no set answers – you’re all listening together, to hear what God might be revealing. Depending on time and the concentration span of your group, decide whether to read the whole passage, or just a section of it. If you’re using just a couple of verses, we recommend John 3:16-17.
Questions
What might God be saying to us through this passage?
Where is Nicodemus on his faith journey?
Looking at verses 16-17, what was the good news for Nicodemus from Jesus?
Discussion
How will our life together this week be different because of these words?
What am I going to think about?
What am I going to do?
What am I going to talk with God about?
Photos
Assuming that all the members of your group have mobile phones with cameras, invite them to spend the week looking for things that are good news to take pictures of and share with the group. You could text them during the week to remind them and, if you wanted, set up a webpage to post the pictures to, so that all your group can see the good news that each individual has found. Discuss together the kinds of things that they expect to see – newspaper headlines, flower buds, gospel posters outside churches, amazing landscapes … see what ideas they can come up with.
Daily reading
Decide together to read the Nicodemus passage each day and to record what catches their attention each day as they become more familiar with the text.
Be the Good News
Plan a bit of guerrilla blessing. Work out together a list of ten random acts of kindness (picking up litter that they didn’t drop, holding a door open for someone, complimenting a friend, doing a chore without being asked…). Give each group member a copy of the list and then set the challenge of who can tick off the most activities from the list.
Here’s my adapted version of session 1 from the Winchester Lent course on The Kingdom of God (Matthew 4:1-11) for 11-18 year olds:
Mission Outcome: We commit to living the mission of Jesus, working with him to reveal the kingdom.
Introduction
We are going to spend the next few weeks discovering and learning more about what it means to love and follow Jesus with lots of different churches near and far will be!
Do not touch
Before the young people arrive, set out plates of cakes, sweets, chocolate, etc. on the table, and then put up a big sign that reads ‘Do Not Touch’. It’s up to you how long you leave the temptation there.
Bum Spelling
Description:
Ensure each team has a chair. One person is picked from the team. A person from one team stands on a chair, facing away from the other team. They then bend over, put their hands on their knees and move their legs and hips to ‘spell’ a word with their bottom. The other team has to guess what the word is and gets a point if they guess it correctly. Vary the length of the words to make it interesting. Give a prize to the team with the most points.
Lost and found
Buy or make a Find It jar. You will need a large plastic jar (the kind that sweet shop sweets come in would be ideal), enough rice to fill the jar and a load of small objects that you can mix in with the rice: a die, a feather, a toy soldier, a paper clip, a pin, a sim card, etc. Put the items in the jar, and then fill it up with the rice, mix it up well and seal the lid. While your group arrives and has a drink or whatever you do to start your session, set them the challenge of finding the number of objects you’ve hidden, without removing the lid. (The original Find It game website is here: www.finditgames.com.)
The idea is to show that the kingdom of God is something we have to work to find and see. Sometimes it’s hidden and sometimes it’s in plain sight – theologians talk about the ‘imminent’ and the ‘immediate’.
Sermon
Illustration: The highest rollercoaster in the UK is located at Blackpool Pleasure Beach. It is 213 feet high, and is classified as one of the longest out- and-back roller coasters in the world. First opened in May 1994, it still thrills people today.
We join Jesus at the start of his public ministry, and we know as we look forward that he will have to face many highs and lows in those three years. From the top of the Mount of Transfiguration to the failure of the disciples to heal the boy, from the peak of the calling of his disciples and their success as they are sent out in his name, to his betrayal by Judas Iscariot, from the power teaching on the Sermon on the Mount to the failure of his closest friends to stay awake as he prays on the Mount of Olives, how did Jesus stay focused and balanced through the ups and downs of his life? What can we learn about what it means to reveal the kingdom today? How can we use this Lent to help us grow closer to God?
One of the key issues we need to face is that Jesus did not fulfil his calling and vocation as the Messiah of God by simply wishing it to be true. There was a pattern and a rhythm to his life that sustained him and kept him focused on what he had come to do. As we look at how he faced up to the temptations in the wilderness, we can see clues to how he managed them that help us to fulfil our own calling today.
A pattern of withdrawal
Those few words at the start of chapter 4 belie a deeper significance. ‘Jesus was led by the Holy Spirit into the desert.’ And the implication is that Jesus went!
The Father needed some time with Jesus, time away from the others, from his family, for him to be formed and shaped for his future ministry. And Jesus went. Whatever ministry we have, wherever God calls us, we are called first and foremost to be a disciple. And if we are to grow in our calling, we need a pattern of withdrawal.
When couples today choose to get married, one of the key issues is what they are going to do to invest in their marriage in the future. Yes, they love each other now, and they are excited by what the future will bring, but what investment are they making on a regular basis to keep that relationship fresh and vibrant?
The same is true of our life in Christ. We need time away from our regular rhythm to focus on our love of God, away from the distractions of daily work and life.
So how can you do that? John and Charles Wesley’s mum, Susanna, found a way to withdraw in the middle of the rhythm of daily life: she put an apron over her head as a signal to the rest of the household that she was taking time with God. Yes, it’s not easy to do – but if we plan it in, and work out a practical way to withdraw, we can make it happen. And for those of us in leadership roles, this becomes even more vital. There is a danger that we relate our busyness to a presumption that we have our focus and priorities right. It’s actually in our busyness that we need to be more attentive to our need for God’s wisdom; our need to be recreated grows larger. Our service for God comes out of our encounter with Christ.
A pattern of prayer and fasting
Jesus alone in the high mountains, withdrawn from the world of family and friends, practises fasting.
There’s something about keeping the desires of our body under control that helps us to keep our basic drives in check where they belong. For 40 days Jesus fasted, just as the people of God had wandered in the desert for 40 years. Jesus is fulfilling the role of the perfect Israelite, following the path of obedience where they failed. And he does so by keeping close to the Father and his purposes.
‘Use your power to serve yourself, Jesus,’ the evil one taunts, ‘as you are the Son of God.’ ‘No,’ Jesus responds, ‘what’s more important is being fed from the mouth of God himself.’
‘Do something spectacular – make a big entrance. Get the angels to come and save you.’ ‘No,’ says Jesus, ‘I won’t manipulate the Father. I won’t make him intervene.’
‘You could be great, Jesus, if you would only let me help you – worship me and you will have the whole world as your kingdom.’ ‘No,’ Jesus replies, ‘my power will be shown in great weakness and sacrifice through the cross, not as a triumphant King.’
What’s your pattern of prayer? Later in chapter 6 of Matthew’s Gospel, the writer collects together Jesus’ teaching on giving, praying and fasting. So what about fasting and giving too? These disciplines help us to keep our basic drives in check.
A pattern of remembering
Jesus’ knowledge and understanding of the story of Scripture enabled him to stand firm.
Alone in the desert, with only the wild animals as company, Jesus wrestles with his future work. As he does so, the evil one comes near, to tempt him to fulfil his calling in a different way. And without all the scrolls of the Old Testament at his fingertips, he was able to fend these off through his knowledge and memory of God’s work with his people in the past.
In 1987, Terry Waite travelled to Lebanon on a mission to free hostages. Through a contact’s betrayal, Terry himself was taken hostage and held in solitary confinement for nearly five years. While his family agonised, Terry received what news he could through fellow hostages tapping in code through his cell wall. He survived that awful experience by drawing on his time as a choir boy, when he had unconsciously memorized the Book of Common Prayer. He said he especially remembered the words of the evening collect: ‘Lighten our darkness, we beseech thee, O Lord; and by thy great mercy defend us from all perils and dangers of this night…’ How apposite that was for a man held in captivity.
One of the key rhythms for Jesus too was regularly to read and study the Scriptures, and to hear them read and explained. So how do you study and memorize Scripture? As we play our part, God the Holy Spirit brings what we have learnt to mind as we face challenging and difficult situations. And through this knowledge we are able to stay close to God. And how regularly do you come together to remember with other disciples the greatest sacrifice of all made through the cross? How important is it to you to worship together at the Eucharist and reflect on the sacrifice that Christ made for us all?
An intentional life
Mo Farah, Britain’s’ Olympic long distance runner, did not achieve greatness by wishing to be great and successful. Everything he did was planned so that he could maintain a rhythm and pattern of life that would deliver what he wanted – double Olympic gold. If we have responded to the call of King Jesus and accepted him as our Rabbi, we need then to live his mission. And that comes only by choosing to follow him day by day, by ruthlessly shaping a rhythm and pattern of life to serve our goal – to be more like Christ and to serve him.
Jesus the Messiah spent just three years preaching, teaching, healing and serving others before fulfilling his vocation to be the Suffering Servant King through his passion and death. His life has had, and continues to have, a huge impact on people today. But it did not just happen. Luke’s account of his life expresses that through the phrase ‘he set his face towards Jerusalem’. He knew what the cost was going to be, but he went anyway, confident that the Father had called him, and would provide all he needed to walk the way of the cross. He lived out his calling through an intentional pattern and rhythm of life. And we are so grateful that he did, as we benefit from his obedience.
As you go through Lent this year, consider what patterns and rhythms will sustain you as you go forward in your calling and vocation, as you play your part in bringing in the kingdom of God.
Questions
40 Images
Illustrator Si Smith has produced an amazing set of drawings of Jesus in the wilderness – 40 in total, one for each day of Lent:
You might want to read the passage through once (or ask a strong reader to read it) and then watch the images together, before moving into the questions. Feel free to watch the video again at the end if your group wants to.
Images of the kingdom
Lectio Divina is a wonderful way to read the Bible with young people. It’s an ancient practice that builds on the idea that when we hear the same words repeated we hear new and different things each time. While Matthew 13:24-34 isn’t a lectionary reading for this week, the images it contains about the kingdom are quite breathtaking. You may want to use this passage as an additional time of Bible study if your group is up for it.
Settle your group, and then ask three confident readers for their help. Explain that the passage is going to be read three times, slowly and carefully, and at the end of each reading there will be a pause for thought and reflection. Ask the group to listen to the readings carefully and to see which phrases, ideas and words catch their attention. When all three readers have finished and you’ve allowed a further period of silence, simply ask: What do you think God might be saying to us through these words?
Small Group Questions:
What do you think might God be saying to us through these words?
What do Jesus’ choices reveal about the kingdom of God?
How can we use Lent to help us live the mission of Jesus?
4.How will these words change the things we think, do and pray this week?
What am I going to think about?
It just doesn’t seem quite right. When we think about the world we live in and the world that Jesus described, there’s a massive disconnect. Trouble is, we are so used to the world that we live in that much of the injustice and so on just passes us by. This would be a good opportunity to give your young people a journal to use throughout your Lent course to record what they’re discovering. School exercise books make good (cheap) retro journals! Ask them to record all the things that just don’t sit quite right – they may find it uncomfortable.
What are we going to do?
A question that is going to come up time and again throughout the Lent course is ‘what difference can we make?’ Your group is going to be challenged to do something, to join God’s mission, to get involved in kingdom building.
At this early stage, why not make plans for how you will work as a group to make sure that this Lent has real impact? Rather than giving up sweets or chocolate, are there habits or practices that members of your group are involved in that they know are unhealthy? Can they help each other to face some of those down and commit to living closer to God’s plan this Lent?
Or are there things that you can all commit to take up this Lent? Maybe commit to reading the Sunday Gospel passage every day? Or commit to praying for one minute on day one, two minutes on day two … all the way up to 40 minutes by Easter. Maybe you could all just commit that, if at all possible, you will all stop at a set time each day and be quiet for five minutes.
Whatever you choose, make it achievable but challenging. Expect Lent to be life changing.
What am I going to talk with God about?
Signs of spring. One of the things that is great fun with little children is going on a signs of spring walk – ask your group if they ever went on a walk like this when they were in infant or junior school. What kinds of things did they look for?
Encourage them to look out for signs of spring over the coming week – buds on trees, new leaves, mown grass, rabbits. Encourage them to use these spots as triggers to spend time talking to God – it might be a really simple prayer like ‘help me notice signs of your kingdom’. Ask them to think of a prayer they could all share.
Here’s my adapted version of session 1 from the Winchester Lent course on The Kingdom of God (Matthew 4:1-11) for 6-11 year olds:
Mission Outcome: We commit to living the mission of Jesus, working with him to reveal the kingdom.
Introduction
We are going to spend the next few weeks discovering and learning more about what it means to love and follow Jesus with lots of different churches near and far will be!
Games
Bum Spelling
Description:
Ensure each team has a chair. One person is picked from the team. A person from one team stands on a chair, facing away from the other team. They then bend over, put their hands on their knees and move their legs and hips to ‘spell’ a word with their bottom. The other team has to guess what the word is and gets a point if they guess it correctly. Vary the length of the words to make it interesting. Give a prize to the team with the most points.
Polo Pass
Equipment required: Drinking straws for everyone, a packet of Polo mints for each team and some bowls.
Description: Split the group into equal teams. Each team needs to stand in a line. Give each person a straw, which they need to put in their mouth. At one end, give someone a Polo to thread onto their straw. To make the game longer you could give each team a packet of Polo mints with the winning team being the team who successfully pass all polos down the line.
When the leader gives the go ahead, the teams can start passing the polo on to next person in their team, threading the polo using the straws. Once the Polo has reached the end of the line, the last player needs to place the mint in a bowl.
Questions
1. What do you think God might be saying to us through this passage?
Read ‘Jesus in the desert’ from The Big Bible Storybook. Talk with the children about the idea that making choices is something God has allowed us to do. God wants us to choose to follow him, and to know his love in a special way.
2. What do Jesus’ choices reveal about the kingdom of God?
Ask the children to make a note of the temptations Jesus was given and how he responded each time. Ask if they have noticed one thing that was the same each time Jesus spoke to the devil. (If necessary, explain that Satan and the devil are the same person.) Draw out the observation that he quoted the Scriptures, which would have been the Old Testament section of our Bibles. Ask them why they think Jesus quoted the Bible each time. What does this tell us about the Bible and about Jesus’ attitude and the importance Jesus put on God’s Word?
Ask the children: ‘Why do you think the devil choose those three temptations in particular? What do you think he was trying to get Jesus to do?’ Explain that the devil wanted Jesus to rely less on God, saying: ‘Make your own food!’
Also, that his temptations offered Jesus short cuts to becoming ‘famous’. At this time, Jesus was not well known. He had not started telling people about God and no one had heard of him. If he did a publicity stunt, such as being saved from death during a fall from the Temple, he would be instantly famous, without the hassle of teaching and healing or building up a reputation. If he bowed down to Satan and received all the kingdoms of the world, then he would have everything straightaway! However, that would not be God’s way of doing things (as we have found out). God’s way are better and his kingdom is something God wants to build with his followers.
3. How can we use Lent to help us live the mission of Jesus?
Use this animation from the WordLive website to help your group think about the impact that a sacrifice can have.
You will need: a tray of dry sand. Talk together about what Jesus did when he was in the desert – what can everyone remember from all that you’ve looked at so far? As you talk, bring out the tray of sand.
Invite the children to put their hands in the sand. Encourage them to think about what they may like to change/give up over Lent to help them develop a greater love for and understanding of Jesus. Possibly share what you are going to do yourself. Maybe build in some time each week to update each other on how you are all getting on. Help them to see this is something they can make a real difference about in their own lives … it’s proactive.
After a time of chatting, pray for the children, yourself and the team helping you, for God to be at work in your lives over the coming weeks of Lent.
4.How will these words change the things we think, do and pray this week?
Finish your session with this reflective video clip as a response to the Bible passage. It may be important for the children to have their own space to watch and listen to it. You will find that your children will understand what it is about, even if they can’t articulate it in words. It’s a great way to draw together all that you have talked about, and discovered throughout the rest of the session:
Conclude your time together with a prayer, thanking God for what you have just watched and for your time together in this session.
This morning I did an assembly in one of our local junior schools on “The Chance to Start Again”:
We all make mistakes. It’s one thing we can be sure of – not one of us is perfect – we all make mistakes. Sometimes those mistakes can make us feel so silly and so bad.
And I’ve got a couple of little stories of people who must have felt just like that.
There was a lady who was really shocked to find 2 teeth in a family sized bar of Cadburys Dairy Milk Chocolate. She wrote to Cadburys and complained and got her story in the national newspapers. A couple of weeks later she went for her usual checkup at the dentist and was shocked to be told that 2 of her back teeth were missing! She felt such a fool.
There was a man, originally from London, but had lived in Australia for 30 years. He decided that it was time for him to return to Britain to search for his long lost brother. So, he came home to London only to discover his brother had emigrated – to Australia!!
We all do things at times that make us feel like we have failed – got it wrong really badly. Sometimes these are silly things, mistakes we could have avoided. For example, in tests or exams we sometimes go wrong because we don’t read the question properly. I remember reading about a boy who was asked in a science exam “what is the boiling point of water”. His answer was “the point of boiling water is to make a cup of tea”
These stories all show that we can all make silly mistakes. And when we do we probably wish we could turn the clock back and then next time not make the same mistake. It’s horrible when things like that happen – we feel silly, a failure.
I want to tell you another story. It’s about a man called Peter. He felt a failure. He had let his best friend down – someone who would never let him down. His friend was arrested and ended up being killed for a crime he didn’t do.
Peter was so miserable and felt a complete failure. To make things worse he had even run away and pretended he didn’t even know his best friend. He just thought about himself and saving his own skin.
Then, in what seemed like a dream – but it wasn’t – he met his friend again. And his friend said “It’s OK. I forgive you. You can start again. Come on, this is what I want you to do…….” And that young man Peter went on to become one of the world’s greatest leaders, eventually dying for the cause his best friend died for.
And the name of Peter’s best friend – JESUS.
So, remember this: Even if you’ve made mistakes, if you feel you’ve failed, you can start again. This is important in school as well as the rest of your life.
Now is a good time to start again, to have a fresh start, to forget about mistakes you might have made in the past. It’s a good time to wipe the slate clean and start again with a promise to yourself that you are going to do your best at everything.
I am a Christian and as a Christian I believe that in an amazing way God does exactly that for people who come to him and admit they have made mistakes and want to start again.
Peter knew he couldn’t just rub out what he’d done but he knew that he was forgiven. That meant he was free to start again and free to begin living the way God wanted.
I believe as a Christian that we can do that too. We can say sorry to God for all the wrong things we have done or said or thought and ask him to forgive us and begin to live the way he wants us to.
Children's and Youth Work
